Subtle Art of Giving a ….. and spoons. Related??

I’m currently reading The Subtle Art of not giving a F*ck.  The author talks about, well giving a F*ck, but in the sense that we all do and we all will.  It is about deciding what F*cks to give.  Basically life can be rough and we have to deal with it. Not deny what is going on with us or around us. So make our F*cks worth it.

It reminded me of Sara Tasker (Instagrammer) talking about only having so many spoons (energy) to give out in a day.  Everyone has a different amount of spoons to give out in a day (energy to devote to anything).  Anger and resentment are spoons, along with F*cks.

Both of these concepts have me thinking how I give my limited F*cks / spoons away each day.  Hurt, angry and resentment are spoons I am giving away. Someone says or does something hurtful or disappoints me. I end up carrying that hurt around ALL day. How many spoons have I given away on that? Instead of dealing with the issue right away or letting it go (easier said than done I know).  I have now given spoons (energy) away that I could have used to read, jot down blog posts or story ideas.

If I think about having a limited amount of  f*cks or spoons a day, where should I focus my energy? I’m thinking Saturday patio time, discussion on blog posts/ideas, reading or giving a spoon to a cause I consider worthy.

Victim mentality takes a lot of f*cks or spoons. Especially if you continue to do nothing about it.  Also focusing on people, events and situations you have no control over is giving away spoons.

Where do I want my limited spoons/f*cks to go? On issues I have control over and can change. Life tosses stuff at us.  Where can I focus my spoons (energy) on that will make the biggest amount of difference?

Say I have 5 spoons a day and I have used up 1 if not 2 being angry at how someone treated me. Spirally down and maybe even using up more spoons. So now I have less spoons to deal with things I have control over. Examples looking at finances, writing, etc.

This idea of having limited f*cks / spoons appeals to me as I can get caught up in feeling hurt and go down that rabbit hole of resentment and what if. If I can catch myself and think oh I’m giving this a spoon (limited) away to something I can’t control, I might be able to stop that downward motion earlier.

I like the idea that I only have so many f*cks / spoons. So I want, no need, to use them wisely.  It makes sense to me, as really I do only have so much energy and time in a day to devote to things that will make a difference to me and/or others.  So I want to use my spoons wisely.

I would love to hear what you think of the idea of limited f*cks / spoons. For me it is about making wiser choices before handing out energy I want to use on something else.

You can always start now!


22 thoughts on “Subtle Art of Giving a ….. and spoons. Related??

  1. I never looked at it this way before, but I like the concept. We each have so many f*ck/spoons to give away. These days, I need to take stock of how many spoons are actually there to begin with. Over recent weeks, some seem to have gone missing completely.


      1. I’m a worrier and worry over alot of things I have no control over.. however having no control over it, worries me when they directly affect me. Yes I need to relax and well more.. and control the spoons and Fs I give out.. but yes hakuna matata!


  2. This makes so much sense. I’ve read about the spoons, but I didn’t stop to think that perhaps I’ve been giving some of my spoons (and f***s) away unnecessarily.
    My spoons are low these last few months. I think I’ll work harder on preserving them. The perfect Sunday morning read for me today! 🤗


    1. It was something I could put more easily into practice. If I think I have limited spoons I have been catching myself and thinking “I don’t want to give this or that a spoon!” then I try and adjust thoughts/behaviour. Yes to realizing you only have so many spoons/energy and focusing it on the best results.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. kimsdiytribe

    Agree! When you carry around anger, resentment, etc it only COSTS YOU. The other person doesn’t feel a thing. Why give them that power over you? Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. Its’s really not about the other person ultimately as strange as that might spund. It’s to release yourself from carrying around a sack of victim hood poison. Thanks Amelia!


  4. The Tea Chest ♥

    Now that’s a thought provoking post!! I am now going to try and see how I ration my spoons/f*cks lol. Hmmmm this could be interesting!!


      1. The Tea Chest ♥

        Absolutely!! I am a lot more relaxed now without work stress so I guess my levels are a lot different these days!


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