I’m currently reading The Subtle Art of not giving a F*ck. The author talks about, well giving a F*ck, but in the sense that we all do and we all will. It is about deciding what F*cks to give. Basically life can be rough and we have to deal with it. Not deny what is going on with us or around us. So make our F*cks worth it.
It reminded me of Sara Tasker (Instagrammer) talking about only having so many spoons (energy) to give out in a day. Everyone has a different amount of spoons to give out in a day (energy to devote to anything). Anger and resentment are spoons, along with F*cks.
Both of these concepts have me thinking how I give my limited F*cks / spoons away each day. Hurt, angry and resentment are spoons I am giving away. Someone says or does something hurtful or disappoints me. I end up carrying that hurt around ALL day. How many spoons have I given away on that? Instead of dealing with the issue right away or letting it go (easier said than done I know). I have now given spoons (energy) away that I could have used to read, jot down blog posts or story ideas.
If I think about having a limited amount of f*cks or spoons a day, where should I focus my energy? I’m thinking Saturday patio time, discussion on blog posts/ideas, reading or giving a spoon to a cause I consider worthy.
Victim mentality takes a lot of f*cks or spoons. Especially if you continue to do nothing about it. Also focusing on people, events and situations you have no control over is giving away spoons.
Where do I want my limited spoons/f*cks to go? On issues I have control over and can change. Life tosses stuff at us. Where can I focus my spoons (energy) on that will make the biggest amount of difference?
Say I have 5 spoons a day and I have used up 1 if not 2 being angry at how someone treated me. Spirally down and maybe even using up more spoons. So now I have less spoons to deal with things I have control over. Examples looking at finances, writing, etc.
This idea of having limited f*cks / spoons appeals to me as I can get caught up in feeling hurt and go down that rabbit hole of resentment and what if. If I can catch myself and think oh I’m giving this a spoon (limited) away to something I can’t control, I might be able to stop that downward motion earlier.
I like the idea that I only have so many f*cks / spoons. So I want, no need, to use them wisely. It makes sense to me, as really I do only have so much energy and time in a day to devote to things that will make a difference to me and/or others. So I want to use my spoons wisely.
I would love to hear what you think of the idea of limited f*cks / spoons. For me it is about making wiser choices before handing out energy I want to use on something else.
You can always start now!