Not my regular blog post but I felt like I had to. I’m using “you” as it feels stronger and to me makes the point.
Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me. Remember that saying? I do when I was growing up. The thing was I didn’t grow up with social media. You said it to my face or to my friends and that was it. It wasn’t posted on Facebook, Snap-chat or Tweeted. It was easier to contain and faded out faster.
Yeah, sticks and stones can break our bones but names? Well names have people committing suicide. This will seem over the top to what I am going on to say but I wanted to say it – it is true. Don’t give phony tears after trashing someone on social media. “I didn’t mean it.” No longer cuts it. If it ever did.
Trashing someone on social media can have serious consequences. Think about it. You could have a death on your consciousness if you have one. Really think about what you are doing before you hit send/publish or post.
On a subtler note I have been listening to people around me discuss how people describe toddlers. For the most part I don’t think these people are deliberately saying hurtful things but still…. “Oh she is big for her age.” “She still has lots of baby fat on her.” Seriously? I have been wondering if these same people would say “Oh she is awful skinny.” Or “You still have baby fat on you since your pregnancy.”
Why are we still focused on looks/weight? These are toddlers for crying out loud. Can’t we find something else to say? How about she has her mom’s beautiful eyes. What an infectious laugh. Why are we STILL focused on this #*^&?
I wanted to do this post as I have been watching someone deal with this. Yes, I know some of you will be reading this and thinking it is no big deal yeah a toddler will sprout up. But it can be hurtful to the parents and have them questioning if they are doing something wrong.
This isn’t bullying. I get that, but it is using your words wisely. Making a choice to make someone feel good about their selves (child) not pull them down.
Even if we think before we speak – would I want to hear this? Is this relevant? Could this be perceived negatively? I know it is a lot to process before opening you mouth. But we can at least try.
You can always start now!
You can always start now 
Way to go! I completely agree, we as a society or as an individual can’t take thing back once they are out there. I think back to the saying, God gave you 2 ears and 1 mouth , so listen twice as much as you speak, its true also that your brain is bigger than your mouth so think more before you let hurtful words flow out.
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I look back and realize I still carry stuff around with me that people said when I was young. It is hard to shake especially when coming from authority figures. We so don’t need more baggage to get rid of – so yes think before you speak.
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You raise some good points here. We all need to be more aware of how we speak and what we say to others. Hurtful comments don’t go away all the time.
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I am a work in progress of letting stuff go. I am now “considering the source” when I hear hurtful comments.
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Thanks for bringing up this subject – if most people would only think before they spoke. . .
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It’s unfortunate that we are so focused on weight and our looks. I wish society would focus on health instead of weight both mental and physical. We’d all be much happier if we did. 🙂
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YES!!! Totally. 2019 going in 2020 and we are still dealing with this. I don’t think social media has made it any easier.
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I agree!
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As mother to a tall child, this drives me crazy. It is not if my child gets a complex but a question of when.
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In the office the other day we were talking about height. Two ladies are over 5 feet 8 inches so tall. They were saying about clothes growing up and feeling awkward. It makes me sad how we are still focused on this $#&*(@^. With you as her mother she will be okay.
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Thank you!! I hope so x
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Well said! Bones heal, but we remember words and they have huge knock-on effects – on confidence, anxiety, self-consciousness. People need to speak less and think more. Hope you’re doing ok – despite all this xx
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Thank you. I just felt I had to write it. Words can be so powerful I agree speak less and listen more. You take care also.
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Yes words do hurt and many don’t realise just how much damage they can do. I really don’t like the toxic mean comments people make on social media, so totally unnecessary! You raise good points here and I understand exactly what you are saying.
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Thank you. I don’t get it either – realize people want to be heard but if not constructive not necessary. Glad I grew up without social media.
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