Life Lesson – pick your battles

Have you ever had to take a deep breath and think “is this worth getting into?” If I give my opinion or take on the matter will it be received well or blown off? If blown off am I willing to deal with that and not get angry/frustrated?

Legitimate questions. The past year has been about picking my battles. What am I willing to let go of? What am I willing to go to battle for? Choosing my battles, for me, is often about patience. What am I willing to put up with or willing to just do.  Am I up for a conversation at best, confrontation at worse? What is my energy level? Mood? Will I regret not saying anything later? What is my relationship with this person? Will it matter in X many days? Do I have the patience to wait it out?

Picking our battles can be major. I don’t think we should let ourselves get the point where we are mad and/or hurt. What we do have control over is making sure the battles we choose are worth it. Even a learning experience is worth something. Sometime I take a breath and consider the source before I take a stand and you know sometimes I can say “Whatever. They are not worth my energy.”

I found out I have more patience than I thought and I am willing to let things of a few things. I consider the source, situation and even my mood. I know if I am tired I could be over reacting to the situation or what is being said.

So consider choosing your battles wisely. You don’t want to be the person all over the place and reacting to everything. When you do say something you want it to count. For it to be important enough for you to go to the mat on.

You can always start now!

 

22 thoughts on “Life Lesson – pick your battles

  1. ellenbest24 says:

    I almost stamped my foot and let my good friends opinion get the better of me; just today. At the last moment I took a deep breath and changed the subject. Friendship does not mean they will think or believe the way you do. Friendship is to be treasured and nurtured it means more to me than scoring points. I was right and am disapointed that she doesn’t feel as passionate or bothered as I am; but my opinion is precisely that; mine. Good post keep it up.

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    • Amelia says:

      I am a work in progress on many things. You are right in the long run what is most important (friendship) or what can you live with is what we should be asking ourselves. Scoring points should be taken out of the equation. Thanks for visiting and commenting.

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  2. susielindau says:

    After going through breast cancer, I’ve got my priorities straight! Lol. Most things don’t bother me much anymore. But the occasional slight still stings. I don’t have time for people’s exclusivity and will try to clear the air if appropriate since there’s a ton of misunderstandings out there.
    BTW, after having cancer, it’s amazing how some people treat me. Like it’s some sort of contagious disease!!!

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    • Amelia says:

      I have two friends with breast cancer. It is a reality check – what is really important here? I only have so much time and energy where do I want to put it? Yes to misunderstandings. I read The 4 Agreements years ago and try to live by them (some days better than other). They are: 1. don’t take things personally 2. don’t make assumptions 3. always do your best 4. be impeccable with your word
      I think people are scared of cancer and saying the wrong things – which I’m surprised since it is so prevalent and touches everyone.

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  3. Anindya says:

    Nice read Amelia. Sometimes, one should just not respond to everything and let it be. Not everything or every comment requires our attention or reaction. Sometimes a decent silence is the best answer and perhaps the best solution to many issues and battles as you have said. I fully agree with you.

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  4. gemmaorton says:

    You’re right, you definitely have to consider if some battles are worth the effort, stress and possible consequences. I have to be really passionate about something to cause a nettle or stand up for something. Life’s just too short to worry about everything.

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  5. amelia says:

    This is so true. Someone once told me I was like a volcano: the pressure builds up inside and every now and then there’s a leak… but if there aren’t enough leaks eventually there’s an explosion. My problem was there were too many explosions. But then I took a course where one of the main points was “you choose YOUR attitude” and that really resonated with me. I can choose to let things go, and yes to let people go, and I can choose to be happier. It’s kind of like the old Eleanor Roosevelt saying too: “nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent”. What can I let go of? Am I giving too much thought to this? Am I letting something or someone get under my skin when I shouldn’t?

    So yes, I think practicing a bit of mindfulness in this way is very healthy and worthwhile

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    • Amelia says:

      I think going into anything with a positive attitude helps. After all we only have control over our feelings/attitude. That is me “Am I giving too much thought to this?” Yes to choosing happy.

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  6. justmuddlingthroughlife says:

    I think yes picking your battles is very wise. I was at my 6 year old nieces birthday party about 2 weeks ago. My 5 year old was upset because a little girl called her an idiot. I told her to just stay away from her because she might never see her again. Confronting the other mum and having an argument would not have been wise despite my little girl being so upset as I did not want to ruin my nieces party.

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